Script

1A-INT. OFFICE-DAY

Medium shot. Clean room and organised work piled up behind DIRECTOR. DIRECTOR sat on office chair looking into the camera (face on) in casual clothing. Lighting blasts onto DIRECTOR from behind the camera. NARATOR sits behind camera and asks questions.

 

(Fade from black)

 

NARRATOR

What inspired you to produce a film of this length with so little resources?

 

DIRECTOR (Calm and controlled manner)

My desire has always been to prove the world wrong. Which involves creating a worldwide trend in young directors. Who I believe should take the main stage.

 

--ACTOR enters scene

 

ACTOR (To DIRECTOR)

I need my next outfit ready for…

 

(ACTOR cut off by DIRECTOR)

 

DIRECTOR (Shouting in anger)

How dare you come into this room during my interview. I will have yours cancelled because of this act.

 

--ACTOR leaves scene quietly followed by the lighting flickering which eventually turn off

 

(Cuts to black)

 

 

DIRECTOR

And you get that fixed otherwise you’re fired.

 

--Title card dropped (Holds for 5 seconds)

 

(Cut to next scene)

 

1B-INT. OFFICE-DAY

Medium shot. Clean room and organised work piled up behind DIRECTOR. DIRECTOR sat on office chair looking into the camera (face on) in casual clothing. Only natural light is now used. NARATOR sits behind camera and continues to ask questions.

 

NARRATOR

So how exactly did you get your cast and crew involved?

 

DIRECTOR

I didn’t know any of them before even the pre-production stage…

 

(Cuts between the following scenes)

2A-INT. COMPUTER ROOM-DAY

Medium Shot. Desk flooded by mountains of work. EDITOR sat still working on the film in a room only lit by a small desk light. Camera faces EDITOR side-on with him in the middle and his computer in the right third with a door in the background in the first third.

 

EDITOR

I was his only friend and gave him the idea of the whole film

 

1B-INT. OFFICE-DAY

 

DIRECTOR

I offered them good pay, that they’d sleep in 5-star hotels, and luxury food…

 

2A-INT. COMPUTER ROOM-DAY

 

EDITOR

The cast and crew were offered drugs on a daily basis. They heard that and were immediately on board.

 

1B-INT. OFFICE-DAY

 

DIRECTOR

I promised that this film would do incredible and allow them to get better jobs in the future.

 

2A-INT. COMPUTER ROOM-DAY

 

EDITOR

We haven’t even finished filming and the investors are thinking about pulling out.

 

NARRATOR

How many hours do you work in a day?

 

EDITOR

How many hours are in a day? Because that is your answer. I am contracted to only be allowed the weekend off.

 

--DIRECTOR enters through door to the left of the screen but stays within the doorway--

 

 

DIRECTOR

Just came to remind you that you’re expendable.

 

EDITOR (agitated voice/full of regret)

Thanks for the reminder.

 

DIRECTOR

Now keep working you’ve wasted time looking at me.

 

--DIRECTOR leaves room and leaves door to close on its own--

 

EDITOR

That happens every hour, I would say something, but it says within the contract “Thou must put up with me and my problems with no questions asked”. I told him that the editing will take at least a year to complete, at the time he agreed and was fine but about an hour later he said do it in 6 months. I’ve been editing all footage whilst they film to speed it up to try and make him happy.

 

NARRATOR

And for how long have you been editing on this one film.

 

EDITOR

9 months. I called you guys in to expose what he was doing here. Hopefully we can get the film to be cancelled.

 

3A-EXT. WOODS-DAY

Handheld camera. Following DIRECTOR and ACTOR into the woods. Camera in front of the characters. Long shot. DIRECTOR is in front of ACTOR but to the right whilst ACTOR places himself in the middle of the screen.

 

 

DIRECTOR

You’re lucky to be able to film this let alone be on set with us.

 

(Cut to next scene)

 

4A-INT. WOODS-DAY

Handheld camera. Director propped up on chair not paying attention to the ongoing scene. One camera in front of DIRECTOR facing ACTOR whilst he plays out his scene in the background. DIRECTOR has his chair facing towards the scene being filmed. Scene done by ACTOR will be improv but need to portray a slow mental breakdown.

 

DIRECTOR (faces camera instead of what is going on)

I have that much confidence in him that I don’t actually need to direct him. No, I lie I gave him 3 key words to think about passion, loss, and mental health.

 

NARRATOR

Isn’t the camera supposed to be filming whilst he’s doing his scene?

 

DIRECTOR

What do you mean? I let him warm up his acting ability and then tell him it was brilliant, but I just need another take.

 

NARRATOR

Don’t you think that’s a missed opportunity encase he can’t replicate what he initially did?

 

 DIRECTOR

Do you think I am the type to care about that? Well I am, why didn’t I think about that sooner.

 

--ACTOR comes running to the DIRECTOR--

 

ACTOR (out of breath and scared)

I don’t think I can film this scene right now.

 

DIRECTOR

What's wrong with you why can’t ya?

 

ACTOR

I saw something terrifying, a sasquatch.

 

DIRECTOR (after a pause)

(sigh) No you didn’t.

 

ACTOR

I’m not lying.

 

DIRECTOR

Just get back to work.

 

ACTOR

Will do, but if I get eaten it’s your fault.

 

--ACTOR walks off back to his original spot--

 

NARRATOR

What was that all about?

 

DIRECTOR (Trying not to reveal the truth)

He’s not on Earth all the time.

 

ACTOR (Shouting to DIRECTOR)

These fairies are a bit off putting.

 

NARRATOR

I heard a rumour that you offered your cast and crew drugs, is that what this is?

 

DIRECTOR

How absurd is that? Why on Earth would I have to stoop that low.

 

-DIRECTOR rubs his finger below his nose and sniffs—

 

--Camera zooms in--

 

NARRATOR

What was that?

 

DIRECTOR (Trying to remain calm and clearly lying)

Heating's not on.

 

(Cut after a pause)

 

NARRATOR

How long do you predict the editing to take?

 

DIRECTOR (Lying horribly in a higher voice)

About 1 more month. He does try his hardest our editor.

 

NARRATOR

You say that as if you only have one editor.

DIRECTOR

Are you supposed to have more?

 

(Cut to next scene)

 

1C-INT. OFFICE-DAY

Medium shot. Clean room and organised work piled up behind DIRECTOR. ACTOR sat on office chair looking into the camera (face on) in designer clothing. Lighting blasts onto ACTOR from above. NARATOR sits behind camera and asks questions.

 

NARRATOR

Have you come back down to Earth since I last saw you?

 

ACTOR (Genuinely confused)

Sorry I didn’t catch that?

 

NARRATOR

Have you calmed down since I last saw you?

 

ACTOR

Yes, I feel a lot better, the scene we were filming that day was that intense that my powerful mind tricked itself. It happens to the best of us. And by the best I mean me.

 

NARRATOR

What do you think about the film and the director’s intentions for the final product?

 

ACTOR

I personally think it’s all me. People storm out of their homes demanding the release dates of my films. So even the editors botch it my numbers will still rise.

 

NARRATOR

 Don’t you think that you sound slightly big headed about now.

 

ACTOR

And so, what? This is my big blockbuster film, my Mona Lisa, my chance to go all out.

 

5A-INT. CORRIDOR-NIGHT

Long shot. Clean. ACTOR and DIRECTOR having a debate that has lasted long enough to nearly cause shouting. Corridor lights are on. Basic scene, handheld camera.

 

DIRECTOR

I have had you the outfit for your next scene will be ready when you grow up and stop acting like some big shot. Okay? So are you going to put your dummy in and keep on sucking or continue to spit it out at every opportunity.

 

ACTOR

Once I get the pay I was promised then I might stop being an arse, yes. But only then.

 

DIRECTOR

Well, if you’re not happy with your current pay then you can fuck-

 

(Cuts out the end of the swear to blend that with the first word of the next scene)

 

2B-INT. COMPUTER ROOM-DAY

Long Shot. Desk flooded by mountains of work. EDITOR sat still working on the film in a room only lit by a small desk light. Camera faces EDITOR side-on with him in the middle and his computer in the right third with the DIRECTOR in the background in the first third.

DIRECTOR

-Functioning becomes a difficult thing for me to do just because I see your face.

 

EDITOR

I asked when we were next eating.

 

DIRECTOR

You want to eat do you. What can you not afford your own food you little peasant-

 

(Cuts out the end of the swear to blend that with the first word of the next scene)

 

5A-INT. CORRIDOR-NIGHT

 

DIRECTOR

-Pleasant people are just impossible to find apparently because I must put up with you and spouts like this over an outfit.

 

ACTOR

You’re clearly just jealous of my prestigious level of fame, that to you is the only reason I’m onboard.

 

DIRECTOR

You’re not even that famous you selfish cunt-

 

(Cuts out the end of the swear to blend that with the first word of the next scene)

 

2B-INT. COMPUTER ROOM-DAY

 

DIRECTOR

-Cutlery would be more useful at editing than you... IF YOU COULD AFFORD IT!

 

ACTOR

This starting to feel like straight up bullying.

 

DIRECTOR (No holding back)

OH, SHUT UP YOU ABSOLUTE DOORKNOB!

 

(Storms out refusing to close the door)

 

(Camera zooms in on EDITOR)

 

EDITOR (To NARRATOR)

You regret coming to film this don’t you?

 

6A-EXT. OFFICE-NIGHT

DIRECTOR starts in office but walks out not long into the scene. Medium-long shot. Door to the office not in frame.

 

(DIRECTOR walks into scene)

 

DIRECTOR (Beat down mentally)

I um... just got off the phone with the production company who I work under and... they cancelled the film. All that work over the last 10 months gone to waste.

 

NARRATOR (Hinting that he’s the problem)

Is there anything you think you could have done differently to have prevented this?

 

DIRECTOR (After a pause and a huff)

Hired a different editor.

 

Roll credits. 

I have created a script for the film to streamline the pre-production and filming process as I now no longer have to come up with creative ideas on the spot. The process took about a week and went through several ideas before I landed on scenes I was happy with, overall I am happy with the result. The final film should not feel disconnected because of this as the script keeps the ideas all together even if whilst filming we improvise some new lines or something goes wrong.